This real story from the director of the Ball State University is more about a staff or adult position than a students. But it shows how family and or friends can influence a person’s ability to advance. Outside forces can be a barrier and sometimes they are harder to overcome than the job itself.

Bruce tells it like this. “My favorite story involves a lady we hired as a temporary and then as a permanent custodian. She started out a very shy and quiet individual. As time went on, she started coming out of her shell. We found out that her husband was a very jealous and controlling individual, bordering on being verbally and psychologically abusive.

The entire staff gave her as much support as we could and worked on her self-confidence. Her husband tried to convince her that the best way to save their marriage was for her to become a stay at home mom.

It was obvious that the husband had become threatened by her personal development and the ability to become financially independent if she so chose.

 She was ready to quit her job to save her marriage.

If she did quit and then wanted to come back to the university she would have been hired back in a moment because she was an excellent employee.

The problem was that at the time, the university had a two-tiered wage scale for custodians; new hires were paid significantly less. So, we convinced her to ask for a leave of absence, as this would give her six months off to determine if being a stay at home mom was working for her and in fact resigning her position was the best thing for her.

If not, she could come back to work and retain her current pay rate which was much higher than what she would have received by hiring back in as a new employee.

Her husband was against the idea of her taking a leave of absence. She decided to take the leave of absence and at the end of six months she came back to work.

Since coming back to work, she continued to grow and develop and was eventually promoted to Custodial Group Leader on the first shift. This is an important position, as not only does she supervise other custodians, she has to interact with clients using the facilities. Often times the clients are campus and community leaders. This women grew from being a shy, quiet almost withdrawn person into an engaging individual who is well liked and respected by all that come to know her.”

Good story Bruce! I think this kind of situation is fairly common. I know that even boyfriends and girlfriends can hold a young person back from a job or a dream.

It seems unreasonable to me to think a person can’t rise to their full potential because a spouse is being unreasonable, but life is full of ups and downs, pulls and tugs.  Good for her for trying to please everyone but ultimately pleasing herself.